As year number forty-seven on this spectacular sphere we call Earth begins I find myself in one hell of a fight. The battle is not against anyone in particular or one that you could say is urgent. No, it’s a fight against myself. The opponent: My rapidly burgeoning “Dad Bod” and the outcome of what has so far been a lengthy altercation is far from certain.
Just as with any contest, it is important to know who your enemy is. That has not been the problem. The struggle has been against my continuation to accept the status quo when it comes to sweets.
More than two and a half years ago I decided to give up drinking. It’s something that has been life changing. Unfortunately, filling the void of the Keystone Lights has been an onslaught of sugary delites. Here I thought giving up the sauce would finally put me over the top in the ever escalating war against what one TJ Maxx shirt referred to as a “Father Figure.” Nope.
It’s like things made of sugar lurk on every corner. They appear in the form of fundraisers (darn you AAHS General Interest Club), Martin’s store brand cookies that are slightly undercooked, candy of all varieties, and especially ice cream, preferably from a little place on the outskirts of town called The Milky Way. You’d think that the sky high price of gas would prevent me from making the twenty-three minute round trip, but sadly, no. I feel as though it’s hopeless and that loss is inevitable.
It reminds me of when my former head coach at St. Francis College rolled in a TV and VCR for our scouting report on the 1995-1996 Georgetown Hoyas the night before we played them. As he was about to put the scouting tape in, he shook his head and placed it on top of the VCR. He looked at us and said, “Guys, I just want to run a backdoor cut against John Thompson.” Translation: Fellas, we are not going to win tomorrow against a team led by Allen Iverson and seven McDonald’s All-Americans. Let’s just accept the reality of the situation. By the way, halfway through the second half of the game we did run that backdoor cut successfully and our bench erupted—we were down by twenty-seven points.
To make matters worse, I have just learned that the franchise Peace, Love, and Little Donuts may be setting up shop in the former Donut Connection building that is literally fifty-seven steps from my front door. Have you ever had those donuts before? They are mind-blowing! How can I possibly change the status quo with those tiny tantalizing treats just a mere thirty seconds away?
A few weeks ago I put up a formula on the board for my classes. We were studying the Wright Brothers and how a similar blueprint could certainly be found when the Ohio brothers achieved flight. I think it is applicable here. In fact, my students applied it to an aspect of their lives that they wanted to change. So here goes.
Identify, question, and challenge the status quo: This has been done many times so far. No doubt I have acknowledged the Dad bod status quo must change. How much it’s been challenged is debatable.
Incorporate successful innovative solution to fix the problem: Still working on this.
Hard Work: The path of least resistance has absolutely owned me in this endeavor. I have the willpower of a dog on a meat truck.
Failure: Got this one covered!
Success: I may need to re-define this term.
Most likely this current status quo isn’t going anywhere. It’s probably here to stay. Sure it can be a bit disheartening when I drive over speed bumps or attempt to jump, but the way I see it, as long as the fight continues I can look myself in the mirror—just as long as it’s from the neck up.
-Tommy O’Sionnach
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You conquered giving up the beer-congratulations to you!
I will offer little tidbit: while I was still working, I gave up chocolate for lent. Everybody knows my love for chocolate. I was a mess, nasty to co-workers, family, etc. On Easter Sunday, as I was raiding the kids baskets, I found I had lost the need for “a box of chocolates”. One Hershey kiss or maybe 2 or 3 m&ms would suffice. And, although I still love Chocolate, to this day, one bite of cake or one spoonful of ice cream or one cookie - satisfies the urge. Try it; it might be your solution. The test will be: one bite of the peace/ love donuts. You are right about them😘
Good luck 🍀
Love this one dad😂