“People don’t notice the things we do for them until we stop doing them.”
-Mike Skinner
In a world full of unsung heroes, maybe one of the most underappreciated cogs in the wheel of our society would have to be the school crossing guard. These wonderful folks have been responsible for making sure school-aged kids everywhere arrive and depart safely from their institutions of learning for over a century. Their jobs became necessary due to the invention and proliferation of automobiles everywhere. To the casual observer, their occupation doesn’t seem that stressful, but actually stepping into their shoes—as I did just a few short weeks ago—certainly proves otherwise.
Every school day, the first person I see when I get out of my car and the last one I encounter before heading home is Ed, the crossing guard at the intersection of 6th Avenue and 13th Street. In his profession, Ed is nothing short a maestro/veteran quarterback who is cloaked in immense power as he handles the most active four corners of the entire Altoona Area School District. Over the last few years, I have always been impressed with how effortlessly he works, rarely losing his composure, while dealing with all elements of Central PA’s weather and the insanity of some of its finest residents.
Recently, I had a chance to talk to Ed as he was training a young padawan crossing guard in a way that echoed Yoda’s tutelage of Luke Skywalker on the Dagobah System. I asked him a number of questions in light of my recent stint as a fill-in crossing guard from a few weeks back. Here is a quick synopsis.
Me: Who gives you the most problems everyday?
Ed: That’s easy, the Parents!
Now call me crazy but shouldn’t the parents be thanking Ed and his colleagues for keeping their children safe? Unbelievable!
Me: What basic commands do you use while directing traffic?
Ed: Just two. “Go Ahead!” and “Hold Up!”
In a stroke of genius, Ed has combined the first command so it sounds more like, “GAHEAD!” He will also employ intimidating body language toward anyone who either dares to crest the school zone speed limit or stops a little later than they should have. The indignation and anger he shows when rules are not followed makes even the cars cower.
Me: What things do you see in the few seconds that you get a peak at the lives of those driving by you?
Ed: A lot of people talking to themselves, singing, and many nose pickers.
Gross.
Me: How do you keep the flow of traffic so smooth on this the busiest corner in the Altoona Area School District.
Ed: Sometimes I will time things out in my head, other times it’s just a feel based on cars I see everyday.
So essentially Ed is half orchestra conductor and half Bernie Kosar—The Cleveland Browns legend—who was renowned for his checkdowns and audibles at the line of scrimmage. The difference is Ed has four lines of scrimmage with some precious cargo crossing.
Me: What do you love most about this job?
Ed: It’s fun to see the kids grow up over the years, from 6th to 12th grade. I enjoy that the most.
A couple of weeks ago I found out just how difficult the job of these civil servants can be when the crossing guard in front of the school no-showed during the morning commute. Doing what any of my fellow AAHS colleagues would have done, I filled in on the fly.
While not nearly as difficult as Ed’s intersection, the importance of the role was not lost on me. What fascinated me most were the momentary glances into the lives of those driving by—and man was Ed right about the nose pickers! I was happy to see a lot of singers. Funny thing was, the few who noticed I was watching as they drove passed immediately stopped belting out whatever tune they were listening to. It gave me a new appreciation for the expression, “Sing like no one is watching.”
My grandmother safely guarded the intersection of Bridge and West 54th in Cleveland, Ohio, for 27 years. And while my stint in her profession only lasted 27 minutes, two things are certain: I was most likely America’s tallest crossing guard for that short period of time, and my respect for what these thousands of brightly clad people do every day to safely guard our streets when the school lights are flashing has never been stronger. Thanks Ed. You are truly appreciated.
-Tommy O’Sionnach
What a flashback for me. My grandmother was a crossing guard for the school district. I also fondly remember my elementary school crossing guard, especially when I was a AAA school patrol. Her husband was a delivery man for Thomas English muffins and would frequently give packages of them to my family. My love of English muffins continues to this day. It resonated with me when Ed talked about watching the students grow up because Mrs. Russo kept in touch with me and would occasionally call when I was a teacher to tell me how proud she was of the success I had. She was a beautiful soul, and so was my grandmother.
I appreciate that Patty!